It’s a little scary out there

Well, I did it. I officially applied for graduation and I’ve never been more terrified.

Honestly, this is not the reaction I was anticipating. Years ago, as I visualized clicking that exalted “Apply for Graduation Now” button on my student account, I imagined myself relieved, happy, and maybe, just maybe, even a tad bit hopeful. Hell, I imagined feeling anything other than this.

Because how I reacted to my application was anything but those 3 emotions listed above; instead, I cried.

Up until now, I had been excited about this next step in my life. I mean, I can’t stay in school forever, right? There’s a world out there, a world that I hope, to some extent, needs me in it.

But while a part of me thinks that, another part of me can’t let go of my past. I’m stuck in this position of trying to be positive about the future, trying to envision myself in a job, secure, working towards something larger. There’s fleeting moments of foreseen happiness that hit me sometimes, when I’m alone, on the SkyTrain or walking to class listening to music. I see it — my future. I see it clear as day and I get excited. Having a place of my own, working, living with my partner. Maybe we have a huge library in our living room, right next to the fireplace, and maybe I play old classic rock albums as we cook together on weekends, and maybe we go for walks along the water next to Science World, and maybe I have a designated coffee spot in Gastown where I edit my online magazine on weekday mornings, and maybe we go to fitness classes together downtown on Saturday mornings, and maybe I’m happy. Maybe.

But it’s those maybes that constantly build upon themselves, layer by dreaded layer, and construct my uncertainty, my reality, and my pessimism.

Because they’re just maybes.

They are the creation of the world’s most resented word — maybe. Those 5 letters hold so much unpredictability, so much potential doubt that I never let get to me before. In the years of my teens, I never let the word maybe scare me to the extent that it does today. Maybe held promise. Maybe I’d get into university and write for the student newspaper. Maybe I’d land that internship and be on my way to becoming the next Anna Wintour. Maybe I’d nab that scholarship and half my tuition would be paid for. Maybe. There was hope and there was light in that word for my pre-undergraduate self.

Now, I can feel myself becoming like my mother, her realist, grounded ideals bubbling up inside me. “Was she right?” I constantly ask myself. Was this school, this major, this life, this path the right thing? Because maybe I made a mistake. Maybe I overestimated my abilities. Maybe my head was too high in the clouds, my mind too far into my dreams to see how the world really is. Maybe I reached to high, shot for the moon and didn’t even reach the atmosphere.

But maybe, just maybe, I can find my way back to that old self. Maybe the future isn’t that scary and I need to believe. Believe — my favourite word. Much like maybe, there is promise and hope in believe. The beautiful distinction between the two, however, lies in the lack of a negative quality in believe that maybe will always possess.

I may never know what 2017 or 2018 or even 2040 has in store for me, and as much as I hate to say it, that scares the hell out of me. But someone very close to me once said that in order to grow, we must be comfortable in our discomfort. And in order to do that, I must confront those maybes head on, and start believing that something is out there and it’s waiting for me.

So, my friends, here’s to turning those maybes into believes.

Until next time,

Jasmine

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Some endings and some beginnings.

It feels a bit nostalgic to be writing here, at the end of what is to be my university career. It’s nostalgic because this blog started when my journey through academia began, back when my hair was shorter, clothes louder, and personality bordering on unstable. You could say I was lost, and through this blog I began to find my way. Well, kind of.

There was something about putting pen to paper (or fingers to keys) that put order in my life. When everything seemed to up in the air (grades, friends, future, and all that good stuff), this blog brought my thoughts back down to earth. I began to explore my interest in fashion, and I was finally able to put my writing out there for others to experience. It was nerve-wracking, but I needed that exposure, even in its minuscule state, in order to learn about myself.

Looking back, I can’t believe I’ve made it this far. While there are moments I wish I could go back and change, I can’t say I regret a single thing about my time in university. This is unbelievably cliche, but these experiences have shaped who I am today and have brought me this far. Even within the past year I’ve felt myself grow, letting go of ideas, people, things, and stresses that first-year me would have never been able to cut ties with. These might seem insignificant, but they’re profound steps in my eyes. Realizing my needs and putting my wants at the forefront, as hard as that has been, has been life-altering. There is something about opening your eyes and seeing yourself in relation to the world that changes you, right to the core.

I wouldn’t say I’m a completely different person, nor would I argue that I’m prepared for what comes after I cross that infamous stage in June. What I can state with all certainty, though, is that I’m on my way to where I want to be, as vague and ambiguous as that sounds. And that’s enough for me.

So what’s next? Who knows. While I will keep this blog going and hopefully update more frequently that before, I want to focus my efforts on future opportunities in publishing and writing. And yes, I plan on pursuing even more education in the upcoming years, namely a Master’s degree and an editorial certificate. But all in good time. For now, I’m just going to enjoy this last semester in undergraduate studies, attend a few K-pop concerts, fangirl to my heart’s content, spend as much time with my friends as possible, and keep on exploring. Because that’s all I can do right? Celebrate the now and look forward to the future. Oh, and believe. Always, always believe.

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Until next time,

Jasmine

A little about passion

Home at last.

This past week has been a long string of goodbyes, hellos, and final paychecks. I left residence for the summer, saying my farewells to friends I will reunite with again in the fall, and others who I may not see for quite awhile. In both cases, it was tough. I don’t do well with departures, and this time was no exception. There’s just so many expectations and emotions; I get lost in the crossroads. But I did it and I survived, all 5’1 of me. It was a miracle, to say the least.

My co-op ended on a good note, and I left my cubicle for the last time on an accomplished high. I’ve learned so much about myself, what my goals are, what I like (and, you know, what I absolutely loath), and what I’m passionate about. That last one really became prominent as my term was wrapping up, because I’ve come to realize that work and passion can coexist and complement each other. Shocker, I know.

Passion is such a funny thing, isn’t it? There’s so much power to it. Passion is the driving force behind change and innovation, and it’s astounding to see where it takes people. As someone who revolves my life around my passions, I really love admiring this trait in others. One of my fellow co-workers in residence and close friend is immensely passionate about travel, urban planning, and Hong Kong. It’s inspiring to watch him take those three ingredients and shape a future for himself around them. He’s got such a drive, such a fire inside of him that I truly envy.

I guess it’s friends like this who have opened up my eyes to the possibilities of passion. I never really saw a parallel between my passions and my future career endeavours. They may have crossed paths once in awhile, but they were never running on the same track. The two were never friends, but rather, acquaintances who knew each other only on the surface. You know, that “I’ll make a pun and you’ll laugh and you’ll think I’m funny but you don’t even know where my hometown is” kinda acquaintances.

But this semester, whilst embarking on an adventure through the world of co-op and micromanaging my life, I realized that my passions CAN be at the forefront of my future. I just have to have faith in myself and believe that what I love to do can help me make a career for myself. So I’m going to go out there and write like no one is reading, discussing topics I love, and see where it takes me. You can bet your tuition that it’s going to be challenging, and this blog will more than likely be filled to the brim with endless accounts of me struggling. But I want to write about what I know and love–fashion, music, communication, and Korea. So I’m taking one hell of a chance, and putting my heart where my fingers are (does that even make sense?), to utilize my passions into something beautiful.

I guess you could say I’m inspired.

Until next time,

Jasmine.

There’s just something about being in a coffee shop on a rainy day…

Well, the semester is almost officially over. Wow.

I cannot believe that my third year of university is coming to a close.

It seems almost poetic that it has decided to pour rain today. It’s comforting, if anything.

Looking back on these past 2 semesters, it’s unreal how much has happened. The opportunities I’ve had, the friends I’ve made, the places I’ve visited; it’s utterly surreal.

I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared for what is to come. Who knows how this summer will go and what the fall will bring. Some of my friends are leaving, some are staying, and some are moving on. That’s life.

I am, however, more than excited for making future plans and setting goals for myself. That’s what I do best: goals and extensive lists. It’s my little type A way of measuring my success.

All in all, I’ve learnt a lot these past 8 months and I sincerely feel like I have grown exponentially. I still have a long way to go, but I am in no rush. Learning to embrace the moment and take in all the little parts of life is what I am all about right now.

I am officially welcoming fourth year with open arms.

Until next time,

Jasmine.

OOTD: Sheer Brilliance

So here’s the thing: I have started to wear a bit more colour recently. Shocking, I know. But the truth is those neutral hues are kind of wearing on my spirits. Yes it is still winter and yes it is still bitterly cold out (I’m from BC, okay: -15 means you don’t leave your dorm room) but that doesn’t mean my wardrobe and attire should reflect the same atmosphere. My best friend Maria consistently counts down the days until the first bloom of cherry blossoms spouts because for her, spring is the ultimate season. It gives her the excuse to prance around in dainty dresses, a crown of daisies circling her petite head. For me, being the literature enthusiast that I am, spring recollects quotes from Wordsworth and Keats, where nature is this empowering being that sparks the human consciousness. So why not embrace the look of spring in the hope of its speedy return, to break us from our winter slumber?

And for this OOTD, that’s exactly what I did. I fell in love with this soft, sheer pink top the moment I laid eyes on it, and the contrast of it’s femininity with the darkness of my black jeans created the perfect balance for me. I decided to match the silver stud detailing on the lining of the shirt with my black studded loafers to tie everything together. For my accessories, I kept things relatively simple with silver rings to coordinate with the silver else where in the look. The result was this simple, but ready-for-spring ensemble that was perfect for the events of that day: group projects and studying for midterms. Ah, the university life.

Credit to the lovely Druscilla Henault for these lovely shots and for hanging out with me in the common room despite being dead-dog tired after an entire day of production set up. I owe you one.

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Until next time,

Jasmine.

Items worn:
Shirt: H&M
Jeans: F21
Loafers: Aldo
Rings: Oval-shaped: Adrene
2&3: Forever 21
Remaining: couple ring and promise ring.

Shoes, shoes, shoes! + OOTD

I can honestly say that I am blessed with where I live. My residence building (there are 8 on our campus) always throws the coolest events, from the Bachelor nights, to this: a photo shoot for the entire building. That’s right, for everyone. At first, I was a tad reluctant to participate. I had just got up, had practically no make-up on, and I had a paper to write. But after helping my friend, Dru (you guys remember the girl who took those amazing photos last post? Yeah, same Dru) do her “artistic expression” shots consisting of a bed, books, and a sign proclaiming “It’s only a Theatre major”, I thought hey–why the hell not?

The posters in our hallway advertising for the shoot said “Bring something awesome!” so I brought the one thing I believed was not only awesome, but a representation of me: my shoe collection. My bounty of shoes here in residence is not as grand as the one back in my parents home in Chilliwack, but the ones I have in my possession right now are my true gems. So I stole away to my room and took up (I live on the 2nd floor and the shoot was on the 4th. And yes, I took the elevator) all the shoes I had stowed away in the various corners of my room. It took me two trips, of course, and an extra set of hands (thanks, Dru!).

The result was the following:

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And here’s some group shots with a few of the girls (and honourary members) of my floor!

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While I was at the shoot, I also got them to take a quick OOTD shot for me, so here it is:

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I’ll leave a list of items worn at the end of this post. In all, it was a fantastic experience, and I can’t help but say I felt like a celebrity with two cameras snapping shots of me at the same time. As much fun as it was, I think I’ll leave the spotlight to Beyonce and Gaga.

Thank you again to Tim and Desi for these amazing photos, and for putting the entire event on. It was such a fun experience. Keep up the good work, guys!

Until next time,

Jasmine.

Items worn:
Cardigan: Brandy Melville
Shirt: Korea
Boyfriend Jeans: The Gap
Ankle Boots: Aldo

OOTD: Winter Wonderland

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Winter is here, my friends. I cannot even begin to tell you how long I have waited for this moment, for the first snowfall of the season to occur. And it arrived, the day before my week of hell begins (it’s finals season, people. I hope you understand.) The weather was amazing, I mean there is just something about fresh snow that makes you want to drink hot chocolate and go for a walk to take in the beauty of it all.

My fantastic friend Druscilla offered to shoot a little OOTD for my blog and I was more than thankful for her doing so (it was freezing out and she was only in a leather jacket, God bless her soul).

Again, credit for photos go to Druscilla Henault because she is flawless. Thank you for sacrificing your warmth to take these for me. I owe you a Starbucks or two.

Until next time,

Jasmine

Items worn:

HeadbandL H&M
Button-up: Le Chateau
Sweater: Joe Fresh
Jacket: Joe Fresh
Pants: Topshop
Ankle Boots: Aldo
Necklace: Le Chateau

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The Future

Hello, beautiful world

It’s been ages since I’ve updated and you know what? That makes me a little sad. 

I’ve missed writing fashion, scanning blogs for inspiration, and forming an opinion on the latest trends. But I’ve been so attached to my school work and my grads that blogging, for the most part, has taken the back burner. I know, it’s sad. But my future is what’s most important.

With that in mind, I’ve been reflecting a lot on what I want to do with my life. The goal is still to be the editor-in-chief of Vogue–I’m never letting that go–but how I’m getting there has changed. I want to start writing for SFU’s newspaper in a fashion section, but I just don’t know if I’m a fit for it. Maybe I’m just over-thinking this. The point of the matter is that I want to write fashion: it’s in my blood. I just don’t know how to get there. Do I continue running my blog? Should I start doing YouTube? Do I write for the newspaper? Do I do all of the above? It’s so difficult to know. The future is so uncertain, and I wish it wasn’t so. I don’t want to be left in the dark; knowing is what keeps my sane. I just wish I had a magic book that would show me what to do and where to go in order to make my dream a reality. That, or a chance encounter with the editor of some fashion magazine who falls in love with my style and insists I work for her (Carrie Diaries, anyone?). But somehow, I don’t see that happening any time in the near future.

It’s now 12:00 am and I’m still sitting here, in my residence common room, having a quarter life crisis. Well, crisis might be too theatrical a word for it, but you get the picture. Fashion is in my blood and I want to spend the rest of my life studying it, analyzing it, and reveling in it. I cannot see myself continuing on any other way. Journalism in fashion is my calling, I believe, and I just want to push it to its full potential.

 I apologize for making this post a semi-rant/frustrated ramble. I’m glad I could get that off my chest, finally. 

Until next time,

Jasmine.

 

So Long, Summer.

According to my calendar, fall is on its way. YES. I know it seems redundant in my posts now, but I just refuse to contain the joy I feel for autumn’s fast approach. The leaves are changing, the weather is getting chilly, the rain is (of course) falling, and up here at my uni, the fog rolls around like a sleeping child. It’s hauntingly beautiful.

I think the reason I love fall so much is because you can do so much more in regards to fashion. That, and I’m a sweater junkie. Anything cozy and warm is right up my alley. But in all honestly, I believe fall is the start of something new. School had begun, the sky is changing, the days are (sadly) getting shorter. There is just so much change occurring around us that it is hard to ignore it.

It is also a time to change your wardrobe. We tend to put away the vibrant, neon hues of summer, and instead opt for darker, more richer tones to throw on in the fall. They reflect both the atmosphere and the mood of our surroundings. Autumn is the season to dig out those knit hats and riding boots, to pull out the scarves and the oxfords. My go-to fall look is something that incorporates both the scholastic feel of fall as well as the comfort aspect as well. Try and opt for burgundys, browns, tans, royal blues, and even blacks. Try layering pieces as well; it will keep you from the cold while helping to build a structured outfit.

Now I pose a question to you, in this short but sweet post: what is the one thing, if any, that you will miss about summer? And if not, what is the one thing that excites you about fall? Is it the ever-coveted pumpkin spice lattes making their fateful return? Or perhaps the appeal of layers and scarves that has you anticipating the colder days? Let me know in the comments below!

Until next time,

Jasmine.

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How-To: Back-to-School Essentials

Ah, September. The time for textbooks, crisp air, and, that’s right, a bringing out the fall wardrobe.

Now, when you were a kid, you probably used to get brand new clothes for school. Am I right? Well now that you’ve stopped growing out of your clothes every year, it’s time to analyze what you have, and how to make it work for the upcoming season.

Now let’s start with the basics: shirts.

1. A knit sweater. For this season, preferably in any shade of red or oxblood. The days are inevitably getting colder (unless you live in California, which, in that case, skip this one), so why not break out the sweaters already? Though it still might be above 20 some days, the mornings are always chillier than the afternoons, so use this piece to layer! Wearing a thin button-down underneath can create warmth for those chilly runs to 8:30 classes, as well as making you look Oxford-ready. If it warms up later in the day, take off the sweater and you’ll still be able to look effortlessly chic. My favourite way to wear this look is with a classic blue jean and a knee-high or riding boot. It’s very scholar-meets-vogue intern.

2. A printed tee. Now I know every one of you owns one of these in some form or another, so why not utilize them now? They’re fantastic to wear under chunky cardigans and you can express yourself in the process. Brownie points if you rock one with a cheeky comment. Now that’s individual style at its finest.

3. A black maxi skirt. These are literally trans-seasonal, if that’s even a word. You can wear them every single season and they work great for all of them. Dress them up, dress them down. They provide so much option a buffet would be jealous (…ha…ha). But seriously, you can pair a simple black maxi skirt with any colour top, whether it be crop, baggy, or even tailored. For the fall season, I suggest playing with the dark hues by wearing a grey thermal or a navy crop top, alongside a white or cream cardigan. If you want to bring the edge up some more, wear a black ankle boot or a black wedge heel.

4. High waisted jeans aka the love of my life. High waisted jeans are not just for the stylish hipsters out there. Oh, no. They are great because not only do they rarely fall down, but they will never accentuate or create love handles like low rise jeans do. Crazy, right? As well, they are super fashion-forward, making any outfit you wear them with look like something off of Lookbook. I cannot stress how much I love this style of jean. They’re one of my essentials not only for school but for life. Anyone who owns a pair can back me on this.

5. Plaid. Anything plaid. The quint essential pattern of fall, plaid is my go-to look for school. There’s just something about it. It’s edgy, scholastic, and just so Alexander McQueen. Am I right? Opt for a basic piece to coordinate when wearing this print, just to make the plaid the main focus of your outfit. Whether it be pants, shoes, or a shirt, tone the rest of the outfit down to showcase the piece from and centre.

So there you have it! I hope this gave you all somewhat of an idea on how to put together your outfits of school, or even how to incorporate some basics into your fall wardrobe. To all my fellow students out there, I hope you’re having a great first week back and I wish you all the best this semester. Don’t let the assignments weigh you down!

Until next time,

Jasmine.